Surrender?

This word keeps repeating in my mind. I even had it written on my bedroom closet doors in huge letters to remind myself about it on a frequent basis, but what does it really mean?

Here is my take on it.

I used to think of surrender as giving up, waving the white flag, being overtaken by another because I was out of resources, energy, taking on too many casualties. Yes…this is a form of surrender. This is what we have seen when conflicts and wars erupt. Domination happens, hostages are taken, and freedoms are given up in exchange to live.

Now I am thinking about Surrender a bit different because I understand that going to battle every time I want to move forward in my life is unsustainable. Constantly competing and using up all my resources is not the way to live abundantly, for anyone, but especially a Projector. So, what is another way of looking at surrender? I keep hearing that is what I need to do, but in my mind, I can’t quite make out what that means if I am becoming a hostage or a victim. Anyone else having a similar take on “Surrender”?

I recently waved the white flag. I was battling daily with myself and the life I had created. It wasn’t working for me; I was burned out. My Human Design shows me that Gate 22 is supposed to be grounding energy for me. Do I align with this? Let’s see. Karen Curry Parker describes the theme of Gate 22 as “You know that you are fully supported by the universal flow of abundance. You pursue your passion and your unique contribution to the world no matter what, trusting that you will be given what you need when you need it.” Life lesson is to surrender and trust in my support. I struggled to feel grounded and supported for a long time as well as trust my own decision making. I was pushing, fighting, hustling, grinding, definitely not flowing or being given what I thought I needed. This is a critical lesson for me to learn.

Here is an example of the magic of surrendering. I was looking for a new definition. My journal entry on 4-29-23 “How do you Surrender without giving up?” A few days later I was in a workshop learning to communicate with the spirit of my business. The exercise had me pull an oracle card and read the prosperity message associated with the card. I pulled Higher Power from the Wisdom of the Oracle by Colette Baron-Reid. I am paraphrasing, it said let your higher power lead, surrender is not giving up it’s following spirits direction. Spirit gave me the answer, I just had to ask the question and wait for the universe to provide the answer. Surrender.

This new take does not take away my power, in fact it allows me to connect more strongly with it. What do I mean by that? It means that I connect with my intuition to lead me going forward from now on. It’s not coming from my head and what other people tell me anymore. It is coming from the magic and the miracles that show up for me each day when I listen to the intuitive nudges, pulses, and messages from Spirit. Everyone has this ability. Over the course of my life, I ignored this and to follow what other people told me. Sometimes it worked, other times it just used up my energy and held me back.

In Human Design language, intuition comes from using your Authority. There are more places in the chart where it lives, but this is the biggest one to learn and understand about your own design. If you do nothing more than learn about the way you are designed to make decisions, you will receive a wonderful gift. You will make decisions that are right for you. You will connect to the right people in the right places, at the right time, and you will know it is the thing for you to commit your energy to. Everyone is designed to make intuitive decisions with their body and not their mind…if you live in your head and make decisions through a logical conditioned process, you just might find yourself in a similar place I was.

To me, Surrender means to accept things as they are and listen to Spirit guide me towards what is best for me. I am surprised at the way the universe is supporting me these days. It is beyond what I originally thought. It doesn't make sense at times, and it is pushing me to face my fears and expand. This is how I am becoming a match for my dream life.

If you want to learn more about decision making and trusting your decisions, I am here for you.